Small catch up

Salaam all & Ramadan Mubarak

Hope that you're all in good health iA.

As you may already know, this Ramadhan will be like no other for my family and I. What began with the entire family welcoming Ramadhan together, will now sadly end with one family missing, forever gone. It really feels like a part of our bodies has disappeared, incomplete and almost dysfunctional without it, or him rather. Yet, with Allah's rahmat and mercy, we continue to trod on. Determined to happily accept Allah's will as our fate as we believe in Him and His promise of the hereafter. InshaAllah only He can ease our pain and keep us on the right track towards Him and His beauty, Ameen. Thank you once again to all my dear sisters and readers who may or may not have stopped by to offer their condolences, really does offer comfort.

Well. Looks like we've almost reached half way in Ramadhan. It really has gone by super quick. Whilst catching up with other sister's blogs, I've come to notice how some of you make a short list of goals which you want to attain by the end of this glorious month. It made me realise how I haven't done the same and got me thinking of possibly doing one too. In short I think the following will be something of an achievement for me:

1. Reading my prayers/salah on time.
2. Doing more dhikr. Whether that's reading the Qur'an or tasbih, doesn't matter.

I did start off Ramadhan with the intention of completing the reading of the Qur'an but it doesn't seem very likely any more. I've had to take a female break and this has already impeded my reading. Not to mention the tonnes of work that has now piled up: dissertation plus preparing school work for my new job starting immediately after Ramadhan. Hmm, sounds like I'm making excuses right. :| We'll see inshaAllah.

So-oo-o. Tomorrow, as in at 1.00 am I will get to see the hubs after almost a week! He's driving from home to my mum's and should get here around 1ish, inshaAllah. Really looking forward to seeing him and getting his cuddles. Two weeks of staying at home every day has kinda regrettably put a strain on my relationship with my mum and sisters to the extent where I feel I need a break before it hits a lower low :| Women and hormones eh. I don't know when I'll be coming back to revisit, probably when things calm down and the dust has settled. A week maybe two, who knows.

Okay, well, before I begin ranting and raving I shall wrap this up in time. Have a great weekend ladies and make the most of this glorious month!

*wave*

Duas please

I feel awkward writing this post so I'll try make it short.

Please make dua for my dad who breathed his last breath on 24th Monday, August at 5.45am. He had been battling with t-cell lymphoma since March this year but there was only so much even a strong soul like my dad could take. He left home on Friday to go to A&E and never came back.

Alhamdulilah, all my siblings and mum were around him every single day and he managed to leave the world with Allah's name on his lips. His janazzah took place on the same day and he was buried here in my home town around Asr time, following a packed janazzah full of all his local friends, pakistani and bengali.

It's a very difficult, testing and sad time for us all but with the Almighty's grace, we find consolation in the fact that Allah granted our's and our dad's wishes for him to leave the world peacefully with his family around him. We stopped asking for his hayaat ever since we realised that it would be selfish of us to ask the Almighty to extend his life when it was clear my dad was well on his way to the Almighty.

He passed away on the third ruza, on a Monday, the day our nabi was born. He was fortunate in several ways Alhamdulilah, it truly is amazing. InshaAllah he will be granted the highest level of jannah.

My family are coping relatively well, I think. Considering we've never had to deal with the death of a close family member before, I'd say our faith in Allah's master plan keeps us ticking. Please pray for sabr for my family.

Remembering Him

Morning world :-)

Hope you're all good and giddy!

I'm up early this morning, even after going to bed quite late. I just couldn't switch off last night, thinking, pondering with some what iffing chucked in. Most of my thoughts were to do with my dad and all that he's done for me, for all of us in my family. I was thinking how unfortunate it was that my dad was all alone at night in his hospital room, he's been there since last Sunday, my birthday. My family stay with him the whole day, but of course have to retire home as overnight stay is not allowed, thankGod that at least they can provide him with company. He is so fragile now, so weak with an unpredictable health. I know for certain that if my dad had been well and good and I was the one in hospital, he would be the first one to be there by my side. I know this because he did just that when I was five years old and fractured my arm and had to stay in overnight. Dad never left my side the whole night and day. And would you believe luck ehy, here I am, three hours away from him, in some strange town which is now apparently my 'home', so far away from him and caught up in my own life: the barrier stopping me from visiting him. I wish I could just drop everything and go to him, but I know that this would anger him more than anything as he wants me to complete my studies, which inshaAllah finishes at the end of this month. I dunno. May be I will just drop everything and go up to be with him, let's see how this pans out. Through Allah's grace, I found some solace after reading fajr and a few pages of the Holy Qur'an earlier this morning, all while praying in the back of my mind for my dad's recovery, inshaAllah. Allah certainly is the best of planners.

B-day: the ahhs and naas.

Salaam world

So I'm no longer a young 23 year old! But am a young 24 year old instead ;-) Yes, yesterday I turned a year older and just this >> | | much closer to getting my pension! Heh.

It was a lovely day alhamdulilah, full of life's simple sweet things. I spent the day with the hubs and my in laws and for the second time, away from my parents and siblings. I don't think the whole "I miss you" thing will ever go away and yesterday was no different, although I have begun to get used to it.

I made it very clear from the outset that I didn't want any hoo-haa with this birthday. A double whammy b-day honeymoon celebration saw the hubs and I live it up in 6* hotels in Malaysia last year, and basically raised the bar so high that I doubt the hubs will ever be able to max the celebrations up ever again (not that I want him to btw)! I mean I would only be ageing, what's there to celebrate right? But oh no. The hubs spoilt me rotten, showering me with his endless love, and yes, not to mention lots of pressies, days well before my birthday. He really is the best and I don't deserve him! But clearly he thinks I do, so it's kewl ;-) lol.

Instead of dining out like we normally do, I insisted on staying in, cooking the family some mousakka. This took quite a while but thank God it paid off. T'was divine! What really topped it off though, was being with the family. Although we live together, we seldom eat together, let alone sit together. Yesterday however, we did, and we even managed to fit in a golden oldie, black n white old school Bengali film. Ahh. Family time :-) What didn't top it off though, was the news I got when I called my parents to bid them goodnight...I found out that my dad had to be taken into A&E last night as his breathing became dangerously difficult. He's had to stay in over night, but I've found out that he's doing okay now inshaAllah. *sigh* I knew he didn't sound well when he called yesterday morning to wish me a good day but silly me, I didn't pursue it any further :-( Allah knows best though, he'll be okay iA.

So. Another day and the future awaits. I'm really fortunate to have so many wonderful blessings in my life. These blessings are namely my nearest and dearest who truly care for me, something which admittedly I don't always succeed in recognising. Gifts are an obvious symbol of affection, but they are meaningless without the true meaning one attaches to them. I pray Allah always keeps me this blessed and surrounds me with his love through my loved ones. Ameen.

Aanyway. We took some pics to capture the sweet day. Enjoy readers :-)

Sweet card and the orchids from my in laws. So so so sweet!

Black and silver Asian dress from my parents.
Pink dress and second black dress from MIL.
Bag from sis
R. Lauren Style perfume (gift wrapped) from bro
Peridot (birthstone) and diamond earrings; Nintendo DS I with Brain Trainer - I was dying for this; card and chocs and not to mention insurance on the hubs car for my driving lessons - all from the hubs!

Home made mousakka! My first attempt mA :-)

Surprise cake, complete with candles and SHOES! lol Very sweet :-)


And that's the end of that.

Dad's the word

Salaam people

I've been away for a little while, up north visiting my family. You may remember me posting about my dad's health a while back. Although he had been making a slow and gradual recovery mashaAllah, his health is still quite unpredictable and unstable, so much so infact that my mum had to urgently return from desh (that's Bangladesh btw) last week. With the cancer being very aggressive this time round, he is having to take steroids to keep him going and to make him feel better. I was really worried that he'd be quite down with it all but alhamdulilah, he is so strong! He wants to get better and inshaAllah he will! Just one day at a time. I'm back in my marital home right now and do check up on him from time to time but just wish that I could change things to be with him and my family. While I was up there, I cooked my dad many things that impressed him and the rest of my family very much - mostly because while I was unmarried and at home, I was the laziest bug in town! I'm soo glad I could do something to make him happy! Oh how I love my dad!

Back up again

Hey hey

I know I haven't blogged in a long time, week maybe? It sometimes feels like a long time but then it also feels like I've never been away, yes I'm a lurker and wander around from time to time without updating my own blog! Too much has been going on since I last logged in to post. I travelled to my 'rents (a whole +3hr train journey from almost one end of the country to the other) last Friday to be there for my younger sis who was taken into hospital last week, suffering from abdominal pains. With my mum being abroad due to family business and dad being ill too, I just had to leave to be with them.

I am so grateful to Allah for blessing me with a very understanding husband and set of in-laws, who despite their own own troubles, encouraged and supported my decision to visit my family.

My sister's condition was very shocking and totally unexpected but alhamdullilah is doing much better since being given the diagnosis and appropraite medication. Please spare a thought for my sis and dad in your prayers :)

On a lighter note: IT IS BOILING! The weather has been superbly sunny and also HOT with temperatures reaching the thirties, even in the northern parts of England! The sunny weather hasn't put a stop to people (self included) complaining about the massive heat wave however! Yes, we (as in Brits!) will complain about the weather come rain or shine, thunder or snow! lol

And on that note, I'm off to grab me a cool lime squash!

Books, clothes, shiny lip gloss in a hot hot noodle soup

Hello world!

I've been meaning to update my little personal journal for a while now, but alas, things have been quite hectic recently so here's my update [ooh, btw, I shall write in bullet form as it helps keep my mind focused, eh]:

• I was at uni yesterday for a lil while and during my walk from the bus station to my building, I realised that I wouldn't be there for much longer and so, should utilise my handy camera to snapshot my surrounding since the weather too was on my side. Here's a glimpse of my uni area from yesterday:

Pic of the Law Building, Wills Memorial if I remember correctly. Awesome looking building.

My building! Oh the temple of profound wisdom! Hmm.

• Gosh, got sooo much to do for this final FINAL unit: the dreaded dissertation! Okay, so I have done before, but the thought of doing another, Master's level at that, is quite frightening. InshaAllah, it will be fine, I will put my sweat, blood and tears into it to turn it into a masterpiece and voila, I'll have the Master's under my belt in no time hah! Now to get to those books about educational research and communication technologies......

• Yesterday was also the final day of darling hubby's final exams! The poor love was ill-ish with hay fever as well, I only hope Allah will reward him kindly for his efforts, inshaAllah. Results out in August, fingers and toes crossed until then. But before then, drool over this delish looking supergrub....I say supergrub cos it was belissimo! Halal chicken is a rare treat in UK, non Indian, chain restaurants and we found it at Tampopo (yes, pardon the name, it means daffodil or something similar in Japanases apparently!) T'was a cool restaurant, serving pan far eastern dishes from Singapore to the Philippines to the people of Brizzle!

'Laksa' dish from Singapore was my choice of the day. Fiery cocounut broth and noodle thing with chicken, prawns and tofu - lush! HOT HOT HOT!!!

Hubby's dish, a Malay 'Kway Tweo' - quite tasty. Shame neither of us managed to use the chopsticks, guess we'll have to practise using the one's the waitress so kindly gifted me!

Vietnamese coffee - with condensed milk! Teh tarik nostalgia!

• Okay food indulgence aside I also bought three books, yes THREE reading books! I surprised myself actually, as although I do want to read more for leisure, I rarely find or quite honestly make the time. Will soon change I hope as the following books seem to good to miss:

1. Reading Lolita in Tehran - Azar Nafisi; have already read almost a dozen chapters, definitely a page turner
   
2. Beauty - Zadie Smith; blurb sounded intriguing
   
3. The Glass Palace - Amitav Ghosh; novel on the happenings in colonial India

• I also embarked on a style finding/developing journey with hubby yesterday as he has recently shown a deep interest in pleasing me wrt: fashion, to which I stressed that developing one's own sense of style is far more important than just following fashion. Bless! I don't know what has brought this on right now, but I'm not complaining! His wardrobe has (or had rather) three shades: black, white and blue: ahhh, I suddenly remember why he's doing it now! Shopping for him for hours on end, was definitely worth it :)

• I've also spent half of today shopping, again, and not for myself, again! Gosh. Self restraint or what!! Good feeling :O

• Finally lip gloss: I now have two cute tubes of pure lip shine! One peach the other pink, both very transparent and s.h.i.n.e.y! Perfect for summer!

So there. My update. I feel a need to do more often than before for some obscure reason: actually the thought of sufering with memory loss is quite scary and in case that ever happens, I have this for an extra memory aid! hehe

As for tomorrow, I am offsie to my parent's on a weekend visit, with a wedding squashed in, can't wait iA :)

As for now, I am SHATTERED! EXHAUSTED! SLEEEPY! Huuuge post huh. Right, I'm off! Nite all!

x

June showers!

Gosh it is so dull and damn out there! We have had a week of glorious sunny warm weather and now dampness! Bleugh. I don't know how some people can find weather like this gorgeously romantic, just the thought of water getting into my toes makes me *shudder*.

So what's been going on in Fatty's world as of late?

I've been swotting up for my driving theory test continuously after a huge slump of nothingness from when I booked my test to the moment hubby rightfully gave me a telling off for not bothering to revise! He never NEVER yells and boy, when he did, it gave me the kick I massively needed! So yes, I am now feeling a lot more confident about my theory test on Tuesday. For those of you not from the UK, all learner drivers must pass a driving theory test and a hazard perception test which covers all the necessary info regarding driving motor vehicles; once passed, the learner can only then proceed to attempting the practical driving test, within two years of passing the theory test: in total, the driving tests consists of three parts. I have actually attempted this test and passed it before, however, due to my laziness for not getting round to taking my practical test in the two year window provided after passing the theory test, my pass has become invalid, hence the retake! Grr grr grr! InshaAllah I'll be okay!


On a more positive note, my two sisters have been on the phone all morning keeping me up to date about the race for life event which they have taken part in for the first time today. I was supposed to be taking part too, but due to hubby's exams, it's been impossible! Well not impossible, but there's no way I'd be able to leave him in the run up to his LAST EVER exam unless it was a life/death situation! InshaAllah I will take part one day as it is a charitable event for a cause very close to the heart of my family. The runners/walkers who have participated will run or walk a number of kilometers to raise money for cancer care, research etc, and since my dad is a cancer sufferer and has been for the last 8-9 years, it is a charity I would definitely become involved with at some point in my life, inshaAllah.

Okay, shall leave it there for now. I fancy a cup of tea to suit my mood in this damp rainy weather so ciao amigos!

All smiles :-)

Hello hello and hello :-)

Hope you're well and happy iA.

I haven't blogged in a few days now, although I haven't been too far away, just haven't had the urge to get things written down recently. Anyway, a little update on everything typeworthy so far:

1. My beloved dad hasn't been too well (will explain later) and was asked to stay over night at the hospital, seems like he will be there for another night only iA before being discharged - he is not in a critical state and is as fine as can be right now :-) . I ask all of you reading this post to take a micro-second of your time when you close your eyes/bow your heads or just remember your beloved God to make a small prayer for dad's health recovery. InshaAllah.
   
2. I have a job! Remember my previous rambling about the possibility of working in a girl's school? Well, I recieved an email yesterday with an offer for the post, which by the way, I only read this morning! I'm so over the moon about this as I genuinely began thinking that there was no way I'd be in employment this September! The relief is just incredible and was evident from the moment I broke the news to hubby and my in-laws. Everyone I think, is just relieved for me as they were worried about me worrying! I'm just waiting for the official contract which will be agreed once the teaching references come through, nothing to worry about iA.
   
3. Thirdly....hmm, nothing else really 'cept that I've been all smiles today, as pointed out by the hubby! I don't think I've looked this happy since,...., I can't remember! All thanks to the most beautiful and kind Almighty :-)

So then. I think I'll leave it here for now before I ramble on and on and on and on...lol

By the way, before I am off, a BIG HEY to my new blog followers: Queen and Aimie. I have been a reader of your blogs for a while now and it is because of all of you sisters (and my hubby's suggestion) that I have felt inspired to start writing a blog. Glad to know I'm not just writing into an empty virtual space!

Cool and out :-)